Fifty Shades of Grey (Fifty Shades, Book 1)

No, just no. When I downloaded this series to my kindle before leaving on a long European adventure, I was reminded of the old saying “if everyone else was jumping off a bridge, would you?” I like sex. And god help me, I liked Twilight. Mostly I loved Wuthering Heights, the book that inspired Twilight and then, this. But, Christian Grey is too young and one dimensional to be that twisted. Even to be a billionaire—it would help if she actually interviewed one. Anastasia is a simpleton, through and through. One thing the book gets right—these two really belong together. I tried to turn off my intellectual understanding and proceeded to take it at just porn-level—but even the love scenes failed to titillate. I only weep for all the trees that were destroyed due to this book.

I have tried to post a scathing review of how bad this book is, THREE TIMES. I have followed the guidelines yet for some reason amazon will not post my review. I'm starting to think they are in love with the book and don't want it getting bad reviews.This book is bad. Don't waste your money. It's not sexy. There's better out there.Is that okay amazon, or are you gonna reject that one too? I will not rest until I get my review up!

3.5 starsEven though I read this 100 years ago when it first came out, I barely paid attention because it annoyed the heck out of me and I never continued on to book 2. A few years later, and with all the love that this series has received, as well as pressure from book buddies who longed for me to love this series as much as they did, I added this trilogy to a challenge and I finally dug in. Thank god for buddy reads I would have never made it.I was expecting exemplary writing and I did not get that which confuses me as to why so many love this book. While I didn’t hate Ana, she was far from a favorite heroine. She annoyed me at times and for someone who never cries, she cried…a lot. What I did love was Christian. Even without his point of view I loved his protective, possessive and jealous tendencies. It was evident that he was crazy for Ana and he wasn’t quite sure what to do about that or even what he was feeling. All of these things are what I love in a hero. That pretty much wraps up what I enjoyed about this book.In all fairness, I have to admit that I’m rating this book according to my expectations of an amazing read. When the whole world is talking about a book I expect more. Had this been something I picked up from a little known indie author, I would be giving it five shining stars. This is my opinion and the way I rate the books I read so I’m rounding a 3.5 to a 4.

My order arrived on time and in great shape. I'm thrilled! So why give a terrible book five stars? I teach a human sexuality course at a college, and this book is an EXCELLENT example of poor communication, disrespect between romantic partners, and toxicity in a relationship. It also demonstrates some of the false beliefs about S&M that society holds. Honestly, it reads like the author has never been in a healthy S&M relationship. Safe-word much? These are great examples for my students, and we mock the book openly in class.

This concept could have really worked, but it falls flat. I honestly don't know how this became a best seller. You would think the editors could have offered suggestions to improve this book. The author doesn't really seem to know her own characters very well. One moment Mr. Grey is sophisticated and worldly and then he says something that completely strays from his character. Also, it's a little far fetched that his character is a man in his 20's. This kind of character wouod be much more believable if he were older and had some life experience.If you want real unbelievability, Ana is your girl. A 21 year old virgin that jumps into a Dom/Sub relationship right out of the gate. And is completely comfortable discussing sex (which she has no experience with) in great detail. And the constant use if oh my, jeez, the "inner goddess", the "mean machine" and the lip biting get old quickly. It's just hard to believe that someone of her age and experience level would be in a relationship like this right out of the gate.Some of the sex scenes are well written, but again (saw someone mention this in another review), she climaxes at the drop of a hat. Give me a break. This story had potential, but I think in the end the writing needs a LOT of work. And another thing that gets annoying is the writer will grab on to a "big" word and use it more than once in a paragraph. For one, people don't talk like this in everyday life and it only makes her look desperaye to sound smart.

The reviewers who claim this is the best book ever have obviously very little reading experience, bar possibly Cosmo magazine.A lot of women saying how men should take note of how "Christen" Grey (it's Christian by the way - again shows how little some readers have actually paid attention to this dull read) treats women - if their partners treat them the way he does they would be straight on social media complaining about how their husband treats them like a doormat!Anyway, this book is the most over-hyped piece of rubbish I have ever come across (no pun at all, it wasn't that erotic). The lead female is so boring it's believable she was still a virgin, and the sex scenes are totally unrealistic (first time in bed yet manages to "oh my" within a minute or so - yeah right!)I bought this book to see if the writing was as bad as I had heard, and I wasn't disappointed. I laughed out loud at the erotic scenes, which I'm sure wasn't the intention of the author.Ladies, there is a whole lot of material available on the internet which will excite you more than this. Go and search and your husband will appreciate it. After all, if this book managed to put the spark back into your marriage, who knows what some real action will do for it.

Sorry but its not better than that.Porn is availablr if you want it, on the internet. I guess some women have not got involved in porn so this seemed like scandalous fun. I found it depressing.Okay it turns out to be about a relationship and perhaps the woman gets to have a bit of power in the end in this relationship - wait and see, there are two more glorious books with the words "mumured" or " I pushed a lock of hair behind my ear" or "I bit my lip" till you want to scream. But it is very popular.

I had to review this. As I'm really dismayed at how so many women are idolising these books as some work of art, with the lead male as a hero.The lead male is a stalker, control freak and all round nutcase who should be in prison. The lead female is a doormat with split personalities.The lead male is messed up as he was sexually abused as a teen, so now he is taking it out on the lead female. Erotic? Hardly.It is written in the style you'd expect from an illiterate teenager. I can't believe grown women are fawning over this. The book is an empty shell, full of the same repetitive nonsense to fill a book. As far as erotica goes, it's unimaginitive and quite frankly boring. The hysteria reminds me of the days giggling behind the bike sheds. Surely the only people getting excited are the celibate, or those who have never come across erotica before. Also to note, those comparing it to twilight. You would be right. It was originally fan fiction. Bella-Ana. Edward-Grey. Jacob-Jose. Google it, the book is available in its original form on the net. Masters of the universe. Same book, same author under a pseudonym. Just the names have been changed for this to be released as "original" work. The characters are based on those of twilight.To sum up this book, so you to don't have to waste your time reading it. Bella and Edward, I mean Ana and Grey have lots of boring sex, in a badly written book, repeat the following expressions......"Biting lip""Rolling eyes""Foil""Oh my""Holy *!?* ""Inner goddess""Darkening eyes""Shattering""Blushing"That's the book basically word for word.

Two worlds meld when Ana Steele falls into Christian Grey’s office (see what I did there?) and shortly after the two embark on a passionate love affair, of which you will have read about yourself or heard a lot about in the press, online and also in its subsequent film adaptations.Hidden in the depths of this book, alongside Steele’s split three way personality (her inner goddess and her subconscious feature prominently) there’s a love story of sorts, if a very passionate one with very unconventional features to it, though perhaps in terms of the White Knight saving the Damsel in Distress, it's wanting to be a mixture of both here?What did I learn from Fifty Shades of Grey after it's 514 pages? Do we all know what we’re getting into when we meet someone? No. Do we have ourselves tested to the limit when we meet someone? Yes.For whatever reason, this book has become a publishing sensation and has clearly entertained many people in the process of doing so.

Despite all the one-star reviews and against my better judgement, I bought the Kindle version of this book, mainly out of curiosity, but also to see if it was as appallingly-written as people say. It's much, much worse than that.The author clearly has a very limited vocabulary and the same adjectives and exclamations are constantly repeated with maddening regularity. Mr. Christian Grey, who owns Grey Enterprises based in Grey House, has gray (not grey) eyes and wears gray flannel trousers; you get sick of seeing the word 'gray' (American spelling) very quickly.As if that wasn't bad enough, how many times does the author have to say "oh my" or "holy crap" or "oh no". It's pathetic.If any part of this book had been written as an O-level English composition it would have failed dismally, and the very fact that this book has become such a huge best-seller says a lot for the decline in the appreciation of our language and our literature.The two main characters are extremely shallow and seem to have no redeeming personality features whatsoever. Even the sex scenes get boring after you've read the same stuff over and over again. A bit of variation, please! As other readers have pointed out, there is nothing clever or creative or artistic in the writing style at all. If this is all the talent it takes to make millions, then I've clearly missed my way in life.I didn't even finish the book. I read the first ten chapters, did a quick keyword search on my Kindle to see if the other 400 or so pages were any different (they weren't) then deleted it from my device before any of my friends knew I'd been daft enough to buy it.Cringe-worthy rubbish.