Mate: Become the Man Women Want Paperback – 15 Sept. 2015

As a 19 year old guy who for the last 3 years has been struggling to find any credible dating/relationship advice - from anyone - I can't recommend this book enough.Why?Mate's foundation is in scientific based research; the information is solid and reliable - Dr. Geoffrey Miller (an evolutionary psychologist teaching at the University of New Mexico) has his academic reputation tied to the book. This mean that, unlike many other dating "advice" books, the authors actually have an interest in providing the truth.The advice given by Mate is also extremely practical, you can distil the information given into points from which you can take action on. You could argue this side of the book comes from presence of Tucker Max - the man who had to painfully self-teach himself the lessons of Dr. Miller's research for more than a decade.This book isn't for everyone - and the authors know it. Many guys live in a fantasy and either don't believe they need to work on themselves (which, if we want to live worthwhile lives seems absolutely necessary - to me, at least) or will try and take an easy route - listening to the trash spewed out by the Pick Up industry. If you're not one of these guys (which means you're in the minority), and believe in self-improvement through hard work and graft, this book is certainly for you.

This book is way under-rated! I'm a 28 year old male who's sadly spent most of his life single, I've scoured through all the "pick-up" material there is out there, but nothing resonated with me as much as this book. It's all about improving yourself as a man, a lot of it is common sense, but the way Tucker wrote the book spoke to me in a way that made so much sense and actually inspired me to take action in improving my situation. It also gave me a much better understanding of the world from a woman's perspective. After everything Tucker has been through, and the fact he's teamed up with a PhD scientist, £12.00 for this is a bloody steal! Honestly, some of the life-coaching and PUA products out there for £300-£500 don't offer as much value as what's in this book.

This is a really decent self-improvement read, its focus is ostensibly about finding a "mate" and popularizing yourself in the "dating pool" but I think its got a better and wider message about improving yourself and your relationships in general, at least that has been my take away from it.There is a really good contents, the chapter lay out is similarly good, no huge, dull walls of text, there are good sub-titles, use of bullet points and summary explanations, each chapter has really good lists of points which summarize the reading or intended "take aways" for that chapter. The work is by two authors, Tucker Max is known for stories online, in print, also on film now, and probably his best known book is "I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell", I do not know how much of the stories are to be believe, personally, and I do know that there is more than one personality who trades on their reputation for being a "scoundrel" or "rake". The second author is a psychologist, the idea being that one brings lived and the other learned experience to the arena of people seeking dating advice.A lot of the ideas are not complicated but they are stated well and repeated so as to assist in absorbing them and applying them too. Such as confidence arising from learning, rehearsing, applying, succeeding and outlining the sorts of thinking and behaviour which will make you attractive and appealing company to others.A lot of the advice is simple but practical, just the sorts of things that people who are single and not already occupied with dating will have time to work upon, physical and mental health, the domains of knowledge (emotional intelligence, social intelligence, competence), will power and the (repeated and better repeated) need of good exercise, good sleep, good diet in putting it all together (and not just in terms of physical and mental health either).There is some of the content, such as the idea of being a "tender defender" which I think is probably unique to dating and unique to these authors but a lot of the advise I think is transferable and relevant/valid beyond the realm of dating to just life itself.I liked a lot of the advice about displaying or making desirable, attractive and appeal traits observable, "showing, not telling", after all, anyone can simply say a thing. There are plenty of people who may be impressed by that alone. However, I personally dont aim to be one of those people myself. I also like others who are discerning/discriminating enough to look at behaviour and not simply chatter.Some of the content is USA centric, like the discussions about academic learning or university studies, or so I thought, even with the restructuring of higher education in the UK to more closely resemble the USA's "academic theme parks". That's not a major criticism though, its just an observation.

Not a book on tricks and tips to 'pick-up'/manipulate women.Instead it explains in depth the evolutionary underpinnings of attraction, which it would seem obvious to me would be interesting to someone wanting to attract.Thankfully these attractive qualities are things that can be attained and are just good things to have in general - being fit and healthy, being clean, having friends, not being a jerk, having interests/hobbies, developing skills etc etc.Also gives some other tips about good places to meet compatible people etc.Lots of other positive things to say, but to keep it short, this was a gamechanger to me. I stopped obsessing about what other people think and started focusing on what I control - being the best version of me. I am a hell of a lot happier now than I was when I read this 3 years ago and this book played a large part in that. Will be required reading for my sons and daughters one day.

Read the book first and only then write a review.G.Miller is a leading evolutionary psychologist and one can only benefit from reading all of his work