Love and War: Find Your Way to Something Beautiful in Your Marriage Paperback – May 17, 2011

What can I say? I love John and Stasi! This book was no disappointment for me. The book which started out at a wedding ceremony which John was officiated and Stasi was "narrating" for us the readers stirred my heart in a powerful way. I actually told Tim - okay, if we ever renew our vows we're getting John Eldredge to do the ceremony! :)I want to start out by saying this book is for everyone, married, engaged or single. Even if you never plan on getting married, this book can help you relate to your friends that are married! You can read this book on your own (like I did) or with your spouse. After I read each chapter Tim and I discussed it which I found extremely insightful and helpful, but if you have a spouse that is unable or unwilling to participate, you could still benefit by picking up this book.The Eldredges do a great job not only reminding us that Love is worth fighting for but that it is under attack - that there is a real war against our marriages and a real enemy who hates everything that marriage stands for. It's no wonder that marriage is hard, once we get over the shock of this, we need the truth of the greater Love story to get us through it. Love & War does an excellent job of pointing us in the right direction, giving us practical ways to get on the right track and see the story in it's entirety!The truth is, parts of this book aren't "easy" to read - John and Stasi talk about the hard topics of marriage - but they do so in a way that motivates you to want to do something about it. They show a picture of what a "real" marriage looks like, and don't try to side step the hard issues that most of us face. The book includes truth like "marriage is the absolute hardest thing you will ever try to do in your life" but offers Biblical encouragement that help you see the beauty and the gift that marriage is. They remind you that marriage is worth it - that your spouse is worth it and that marriage is more than a happiness giver - it is soul saving.

There are over 8,000 books on marriage listed on Amazon, with titles like "Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work" and "Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage". Many of these books have great reviews, but I would venture a guess that very few of them come close to the authenticity and touching honesty that John and Stasi Eldredge display in their book Love & War.Love & War is a book about marriage, about the greatest love story set in the midst of a fierce battle for our hearts. They write together in a way that lets their readers behind the veil of a real marriage - they are disarmingly real. As I read I found myself thinking, "Wow, they really thought that?" or "He actually said that?", and then recognizing some of their same feelings in my own heart.John & Stasi describe marriage as two deeply broken people living as close to the heart as people can get. It is normal for marriage to be hard, but their gift to their readers is the perspective that our marriages can be about a larger story that God is writing - one about healing our brokenness and uncovering the vows we've made that shape our way of relating to the world.Brave couples that read this book might find themselves asking one another, "What's it like to live with me?" or "What is the effect of my style of relating?" or when hard times come, "Where is the brokenness?"This book is a great read for anyone who desires to honor God in their marriage and completely surrender to the work He desires to accomplish through marriage.

Having read and loved Captivating by Stasi Eldredge last year, I had high expectations for Love and War, and it did not disappoint.The Eldredges start by acknowledging that marriage is fabulously hard, and yet we often treat it as we do our health... doing the bare minimum to get by and hoping for the best.They explain that marriage is a love story set within a war. This war, with the devil, the world and our flesh, is worth fighting. It's a fight for each other, not against, as we often let it become.Sadly, I've known several couples who have divorced because `they just don't make each other happy anymore.' It's hard work to keep your spouse happy, right? Well, guess what? It can't be done. The Eldredges use scripture to show how the unending love of Christ is what we long for. Once we remove the expectation that our spouse is the source of our happiness, the marriage can be filled with joy.John and Stasi openly share their relationship, the ups and downs, modeling how to deal with brokenness and spiritual attacks. Their short personal stories are refreshingly honest. I appreciate how John and Stasi shared their individual perspectives on various experiences.For me, there were many `ah-hah' moments throughout the book. In fact, my copy is covered in sticky notes marking points I want to reread again soon. I highly recommend this book to every married couple.Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Waterbrook Publishers. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."

This is the book my adult Sunday school marriage class is using . The topics are real and true to marriage life situations. really make's you think and consider the hills and valleys in marriage and how to navigate it successfully.