Lying

This is a short essay on why we should not lie. At first, this appears redundant, like beating a dead horse. We all know that lying is wrong. So why write an essay telling us what we already know and agree on. Maybe because we all lie every day? Why do we lie if we know it is wrong? What do we gain from this? Do we benefit more from lying than from telling the truth? The author starts by defining what he means by lying. Most people would define lying as telling something that is not true. However, by this definition, an actor playing a character on stage is lying because he is telling us that he is someone else, and he is pretending to feel emotions and think things he is not really feeling and thinking. If I say something that is false but I don’t know that it is false, am I lying? What if I am saying things that are technically speaking true, but that will create a false impression in the other person’s mind? What if someone asks me a question and I give an evasive answer? Is changing the subject lying? The author defines lying in the broader senses as engaging in willful deceit. For him lying is any situation when through my words and actions I am deliberately trying to create an impression in the other person’s mind that is different from what I myself understand to be the truth. Also, the other person must at the same time expect me to be honest. The author does talk about deceit in exceptional situations, such as spies operating undercover or lying to protect a life. He has mixed feelings about it. He says that there are better solutions (although he does not say what these solutions are), but he acknowledges that sometimes deceit is the best option. I myself believe that protecting human life trumps honesty. If I can protect a life by being honest, by all means I will do it. But if there is no other option, I will lie through my teeth to protect another. Still, these are exceptional situations. I have never been in one and I hope that neither will you. But this book is not about such situations, but about everyday deceit in which almost all of us engage daily. People deceive for three main reasons. They are afraid that the truth will affect them negatively, they hope that they will gain something by creating a false impression, and they are deceiving for the benefit of another. I will start with the last argument, that deceit is done in the best interest of another person. Quite often this is simply not true. Quite often we tell ourselves that we are deceiving someone for their own good in order to justify our actions. (I will get to self-deceit later.) But even if we really do it for their benefit, do we really have the right to make this kind of decision for them? What gives us the right to deny them the truth? Do we really think that they are too stupid and/or weak to handle the truth? And even if they are, how are they supposed to grow stronger and smarter if we cocoon them with lies? Imagine that someone is deceiving you for your own good. Maybe you don’t have to imagine because it did happen to you. It did happen to me once or twice. Would you not feel insulted that those other people thought that you can’t handle the truth? I was. But deceiving for the benefit of another is not as frequent as deceiving for our own benefit. We deceive to gain advantage and to hide our failures and wrongdoings. The author argues that (and I agree) deceit creates more problems than it solves. Once exposed, deceit makes people angry. Not only are they angry for the initial offense, but the deceit we have used subsequently to hide the offense makes things even worse. Even if we are never caught, we live in fear of being exposed. The protect the initial lie from being revealed, quite often we must create even more deceit. Soon we are creating a complicated web of lies. Some people are compulsive liars or psychopaths and they have no problem doing that. They even enjoy it. But most people are not like that. I myself have to admit that occasionally I have engaged in deceitful behavior. A couple of times I got caught and my lies have only made things worse. But even on the occasions when I got away with it and there was next to no chance of my lies being exposed, I still felt sullied. But whenever I chose to tell the truth, no matter the consequences, I felt relief. A commitment to always telling the truth is of tangible benefit. Not only we don’t get into trouble by lying, but we can no longer deceive ourselves. We humans have an amazing capacity to engage in self-deceit. We keep telling ourselves lies until we eventually come to believe in them. By being honest with others, we are forced to be honest with ourselves. This all sounds nice and fine in theory, but in practice we are often afraid to tell the truth because we are scared of the repercussions. There are situations when telling the truth can end badly for us. What should we do? Obviously, there are situations when telling the truth might result in some terrible tragedy. The author is ambiguous about such situations and so am I. But I am talking about everyday situations. To this I say that for one, a commitment to honesty will make us a better moral person and will decrease the probability that we will do something shameful. Since we know that we won’t have the option to lie about it, we are going to be more likely to do the right thing in the first place. As for the people to whom we tell the truth, they might resent us for the initial wrong that we did, but they will appreciate our honesty and even come to respect us. But what if they don’t? Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone is entitled to recognize his wrongdoings, come forward and seek atonement. As long as the confession is sincere and the sinner’s efforts to atone and improve are genuine, then they deserve forgiveness. If someone is unwilling to forgive no matter what, then maybe this is not a person that we would like to have in our life. But what if the truth results in a broken relationship, loss of job or even going to jail? This is of course a difficult situation and each one has to make his own choices. I will only advise that if we are involved in a situation (a relationship, employment, etc.) that is founded on deceit and the truth would destroy it, then maybe it would be better to end this situation one way or another. The author talks about some other things such as the fact that honest people attract and keep more friends whereas dishonest people turn them away. Even if our deceit is never exposed, lying builds barriers between people that eventually drive them away. There is also talk about the long history of deceit by governments and other institutions. There is this joke. “How can you tell a politician is lying? His lips are moving.” An exaggeration, but not by much. Whenever I learn that the government has been lying about something, I get angry, but I do not get surprised anymore. Years of hearing lies from our so called leaders have made me completely cynical. It is really amazing how much argument the author crams into such a short essay. But make no mistake, it is very thought provoking. And although I was overall committed to telling the truth before, reading this book only strengthened my resolve. The only problem I have with this book is that at times the author sounds too absolutist to me. He does not recognize that telling the truth is sometimes very hard. He says that we should tell the truth at all times and that is it. Or at least that is the impression that I got few times when reading. But it is a minor peeve. The book is a must-read and although it will not turn you into a saint, it will (it is my hope, at least) set you on the path of honesty. Believe me when I say this, being deceitful is indeed a viable solution to your problems, but in the long run it will almost always make things worse. Telling the truth, no matter how bad in the short run, is almost always a better long-term solution to our problems. I am speaking from (hard earned and painful) experience. I give this book five stars.

This is a simple work by Sam Harris and perhaps the least controversial. Although not a exhaustive discourse, Harris provides that lying is both socially and personally damaging and should be avoided. By no means is it easy to remain truthful, amongst a world with double speaking politicians and a competitive job marketing, but that doesn't curtail Harris' conviction. He says "We are talking about a culture poisoned by lies. And that is a culture worth changing. " Although not easy, truth will bring about a redeemed culture. I am familiar with ethics, having read Benthram, Kant , and the like. For those like myself, Harris doesn't say anything new. Although his power of rhetoric stands out as compelling of this impertive. The most insightful point of Harris' which I believe society would do well to remember revolves around alturistic white lies. Harris says "When we presume to lie for the benefit of others, we have decided that we are the best judges of how much they should understand about their own lives—about how they appear, their reputations, or their prospects in the world." This continues with the problem of flattery when Harris says "And yet we are often tempted to encourage others with insincere praise. In this we treat them like children—while failing to help them prepare for encounters with those who will judge them like adults." Important concepts to consider. A committment to truth is a difficult thing, especially if one is late to embrace this value. But truth is essentisal to personal development. "because a commitment to telling the truth requires that one pay attention to what the truth is in every moment. What sort of person are you? How judgmental, self-interested, or petty have you become?"(loc 118). The only time Harris admits the value of lying, although without recommending it, is in response to a reader question that made it into the audio book. Harrow explains the benefit of untruth is that is the most benign weapon we can use in times of conflict, much less damaging than a gun when it comes to issues of self defense. Yet the integrity of the lying person isn't exempt from scrutiny in these situation, and there's no guarantee of positive outcomes even with deception appearing the smart solution. Although not the focus of the book, harris makes a home run on the value of Justice when he says "One of the worst things about breaking the law is that it puts you at odds with an indeterminate number of other people. This is among the many corrosive effects of unjust laws: They tempt peaceful and (otherwise) honest people to lie so as to avoid being punished for behavior that is ethically blameless." The final reader submitted question in the audiobook version of lying was answered unsatisfactory to me. The reader explains he is a non-believing Jew, but being honest about his lack of Jewish belief would damage many relationships and likely make him lose custody of his kids (I'm telling the cliff notes version). The reader suggests that Harris is coming from a spot of elitism, where others are not in such a spot to act as Harris. An intriguing point, similar to those who claim philosophy is naval gazing for those who escape the plight of the real world. How does Harris answer? He comments on the problem of religion and says yes, this is a difficult situation. Harris offers no answer, but rather says this is why open discussions are to be valued with free thinking people. To read between the lines, I suggest that Harris would have this gentlemen reveal his lack of religious belief in an effort to (ethically) further society through free thinking. It is no easy feat, and the reward to this man himself may be minimal, but that is why people should see to the goods beyond themselves - ethics consider all. To reconsider the opening quote "We are talking about a culture poisoned by lies. And that is a culture worth changing." and hopefully the sacrifices made now will driver future generations. I have no criticism of "Lyings" arguements. I agree there is an ethical imperative to honesty and didn't find a problem with Harris' conveyance. This is a conversational book, not one of hardcore dead to rights philosophy; a great conversation starter at least to lead to deeper thoughts. I paid 13 for the kindle ebook and audio book pairing, which took me around an hour to get though. I am content with my purchase as it has allowed me thoughts to consider. I can't say I would recommend this book to others, as it is both entry level and costly, and my lying friends would probably not read it. However, Sam Harris commitment to truth establishes him as a leader in a time of demagoguery, and for his virtue I will continue to support him.

The book enlightened me about an ethical principle that I imeadiately adopted as mine: to never tell a lie, enven “white” lies.

Even if we all agree that lying is bad, this book helps us lay a very foundation upon which only truth can remain. Harris presents convincing arguments and opinions that allow us to think twice before engaging in “innocent white lies”. Highly recommended, plus you can finish it in one sitting.

T rès interessante etude sur le sujet de mensonges mais j'aurais préferé un peut plus en profondeur avec plus d'exemplaires.

This book has 95 fairly small pages, with fairly few words per page. This fact coupled with the interesting subject matter makes this a very quick read. Sam's insight into the negative consequences of even the most "benign" lies has truly changed the way I think about the lies I tell and have told. Of the books I've read this year I feel that this one has the greatest impact on my day to day life. I'm not especially prone to lying and I strive to be as honest as possible but I justify telling white lies occasionally. Reading this book as made me hyper conscious of my honesty and I am no longer able to tell "white" lies with a completely clean conscience. I highly recommend this thought provoking book.

Pathetic… maybe if I was teenager it would make me think for a day or two.First book on Amazon which reviews didn’t match the real quality of the book content. Well actually it isn’t a book…..kind of an essay